Sunday, November 10, 2013

Dairies of a Special Ed (hopeful) Teacher

I work in special education.
This was not a surprise to anyone but it was for me.

This essentially means that I spend my Saturday nights creating Pigeon costumes and making silly putty.
I spend my Sundays researching new techniques and strategies for working with Autism.  I spend my days teaching kids how read and count.  I am an expert at seeing when a complete mental and emotional breakdown is brewing and most of the time can prevent it.  But sometimes, I don't even try to fight it.

I leave my classroom exhausted and well after kids have loaded the busses.  I show up before they pull in for the day.  I spend my weekends hoping my kids had enough to eat.  I explain answers to the same questions at least 18 times a day, I have to change diapers, I deal with temper tantrums, and I would not have it any other way.

Every morning I am greeted by a stuttered sentence and a bear hug that says "Ms. Y., I miss you last night.", or one that says "Ms Y., you my best best fwend."  When I see my students in Wal-Mart, they run up and give me the biggest hug.

Even in all of this, my hardest day is filled with little victories.  On my hardest days, I wipe the slate clean and walk in the next morning ready for the day.

My relationship with my students is just a grain of sand in a desert compared to how the Lord's patience and mercy is with me.  I have been camping out in Lamentations recently, specifically chapter three.

Lamentations 3:21-23
     This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope.  The Lord's loving-kindess indeed never ceases, For His compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; Great ifs Your faithfulness.

I throw adult temper tantrums, I ask Him the same questions 18,000 times and expect the answer I want instead of the answer that I need.

My path was to special education point was filled with brokeness, tears, joy, and blind faith and obedience on the Lord. My journey with special education is just beginning, but I have a feeling that my kids will be teaching more about the Lord, grace, and patience than I ever could teach them.